Wonderful life

Dear Ms Victim,

Someone who tagged @ 28th May 2011

I sincerely hope that this is the last time I ever gonna direct a special message to you. I'm not trying to be an ostrich, stucking my head into the soil, living in my own world ignoring everything that's going on around me. I kept mum for days trying to make you calm down, hoping that this awful memory or hatred of you might go someday. I put myself in your shoes and tried to understand everything you had been through. I'm so disappointed in everything you did.

I would like to declare that I'm blogging about this solely between you and me. No third party is involved.

Yes, in your own perspective, your part of story, a particular someone had done you wrong. Thus, that's just part of the story you knew right from the beginning. There's always the other side of a story. Some secrets can be kept for hundreds years without being revealed. Life's not just about running at your own pace, at the same point of running track. We, humans have to step ahead before we learn to get on with life. That is life, a part of rules and regulation in our entire years on the earth.

Yes, you hated my bff to the core. Hatred doesn't mean the whole wide world. Hating her shall be as good as draining your life away. One year, two years, or even three. It's not worth spending your valuable years and youth for. We must learn to take thing easy no matter how hard our life is. I'm not pretending to be pessimistic, neither am I as strong as you thought. I'm not a small girl anymore, I went through my learning journey as well. I went through hard times that you might not even be able to imagine me crying over about. Nothing of yours can be compared to mine.

My dad went bankrupt almost twice. I had to stop schooling and work for my own fees. I cried hard in silence when I had no money to pay for my semester. I had to stop my favourite piano hobby that stayed with me for ten years. I was accused not once but twice for some serious issues I had not done, and I gritted my teeth and blinked over the time. My ex boyfriend nearly discarded me for not being a pretty pageant, for another girl.

Don't you find this scenario familiar?

I dumped my ex boyfriend in the end. I got over it within 3 days, it's gonna hurt a while but it's better than inflicting a scar to yourself. If someone doesn't treasure my love, the more I should treasure myself. He's not gonna share your pain. Love yourself and work forward instead of looking backward.

Look at me, am I not doing well?

Till today, he regretted what he had done and tried all means to seek my forgiveness. Unfortunately, all I can say to him is, fucking get lost bastard. I'm glad that I never cling onto the past. That's why I managed to get a super bf who love me for who I am. No matter how fat I am, how ugly I am or how unreasonable I am. I know he love me. That is acceptance.

I never feign myself infront of him. I gobbled food like a lion, woke up from bed with lion head and spoke to him in horrible breathe. I talked to him the way I want and force him to play round of sadistic games with me. He cooks and buy everything I wanted in the whole wide world. He cares for my family means he cares for me too. That is care.

He talked me into doing the right things at the right time. His lectures remind me to learn and never afraid of failure. He gave me encouragement and reprimanded me when I'm in the wrong. That is concern.

Do you really know what love is?

Little girl, you are just going through your learning journey. Relationship is not everything. You are absolutely right, we need companion. Probably, someone dear to our hearts. Definitely, not someone who's not truthful. You got to be cautious in every steps that you are taking. Right now, it's just a slight mistake. You still had a long way to go. Just let this grudge and hatred die over the time.

I know my bff, I trust her for who she is. I'm not going to cast her aside just because she is in a pool of shit. We had strong bondings and it's not something anyone can destroy just by saying something mean. I understand what you are driving at, but I standby her.

So what if she had done it?

So what if she hadn't done it?

I doubt it matter anymore. Seeking for an answer is not going to save your relationship. I'd be glad to see you with a nice and great bf instead of someone who lied to you for numerous time. I'd be disappointed if you ever trust someone like that. I see your purpose of doing so (referring to tagboard). You can make the whole world hate her, but you can't deny the fact you are venging our your anger hoping to feel better. The great sensation shall never last for a lifetime. It makes you a monster.

You can choose to standby your hatred, trust me, it's not gonna get you any further. I don't mind reading or replying to your tag, but I hope you will stop all your slandering and accusation. Life's better if you step ahead and make it wonderful.

I'd be your listening ears. I felt unjust for you for the things you had said. Still, legally, I had to remind you that my bff reserve all rights against your slandering and threatening towards us. I hope you understand what I'm conveying to you and be a little mature. Handle things with pride. Held your head high, do things with pride, have your own say and be who you are. That's where charisma comes from.

Your listening ear,

Pzyy